Thoughts on Being A Pilots Wife.

Sometimes I feel like I am single. Not in the carefree, anything goes kinda way, but in the I spend a lot of time alone kinda way. The problem is, there is no real way to remedy the situation. I know that I have plenty of friends and family that I don't spend as much time with as I would like, or even should. It's just that the alone hours are at times when most people are busy with their families; having dinner, putting kids to bed, all the normal things one does when they've spent the day at work away from eachother.
There is also the home and dog situation, as I like to call it. I spend 8 hours at work and my dog spends 8 hours at home. The house accumulates dust, dog hair, and messiness from the coming and going of our lives and so I feel that I should spend my evenings there, giving the dog and the house some attention. Not every evening, all evening, no, but at least some part of most of them. I am incredibly blessed to have my family nearby and a few close friends I can always call on. I am also very thankful that Andy and I chose a home located in one of the most friendly and welcoming neighborhoods I've ever encountered. Most evenings all I have to do is walk next door, tap on one of their doors, and I have someone to pass the time with. Tonight though, I'm alone and completely unmotivated to get anything done. Laundry is piling up- there is a load in the dryer waiting to be folded, another in the washer, waiting patiently for a spot in the dryer, but I can't seem to bring myself to go down and get it because sitting upstairs folding while I watch a movie just seems too boring and lonely.
There is a whole other aspect to this lifestyle that is perhaps the hardest to deal with- it's almost impossible to schedule, anything. My work schedule is more or less pretty predictable: if I have Saturday off this week, I will have Tuesday off next week. If I work late this Thursday, I will get out at 5pm next Thursday, for now, these are the only changes to my schedule (bar a wedding or some other major event). However, Andy's schedule never really appears to have any rhyme or reason, it's not 7 on, 7 off, or even 5 on, 3 off. Not that they intend for it to be this way, but no one that needs a flight ever seems to need 5 or 7 days, they needs two here, one there, half a day here, or two weeks, just for a little change of pace. In turn, my schedule becomes very mixed up. It comes from a desire, a need, to be with Andy when he is home, while at the same time a desire, a need, to still have outside activities to keep me occupied when he's not home. Here is a case in point - I went to Roanoke Ranch today to participate in a practice run for the cattle drive fundraiser they have going in a few weeks. The horses are rough - they haven't been ridden regularly since last fall, and half of them have never laid eyes on a cow before. They are herd-bound and ornery, and unfortunately, in the last two years since I rode regularly, I too, have lost my nerve. I need to ride more if I'm going to be a real asset to this ranch. Kat (the "manager" for R.R.) understands this and is practically begging me to commit to coming out and riding as much as possible. She needs me to help get the horses in shape, and I, if I'm going to get my nerve back, need to ride as much as possible. But how to balance my home and family responsibilities with another activity? This is where I get stumped.
Most couples see eachother every day: they wake up next to eachother, they come home and eat together. They sleep together. They share the responsibilities. There is a give and take-it's ok to make outside plans, because tomorrow will the be same, they'll see eachother again, same time, tomorrow morning. Our system is so very, very different. When Andy is home, he does what he can to keep the house picked up, kept up, and to give the dog a little attention. It would be easier for me to commit to say, every Tuesday evening at the ranch riding, if there wasn't the possibility that Andy will be gone every Tuesday, or home, every Tuesday. I can't just leave the dog in his cage all day, and I can't just not see my husband if he will leave the next day for a three-day flight. Kat says I can bring the dog with me to the ranch, so his part in the equation is not quite as large as it would have been, but what about Andy?
The ironic part of all this, is that even though I don't want him to leave, when Andy is gone I can finally do something with friends or just for myself without feeling guilty. I can go and spend the entire afternoon at the ranch if I want to, and know that I'm not missing any precious time with him. I get more reading done, the house stays cleaner, heck, we even spend less money because when Andy travels, he gets paid for his meals. If he's careful, he can even make a profit from the per diem. He also gets compensated- well -for working a day off (which is why he is gone today). It's also kind of crazy how if he somehow scores the schedule that allows him to do only out-and-backs for say, two weeks, I'm ready for him to go because I'm used to that time alone. And I think he's ready to go too. I've said it before- it's our reality -and I don't really want sympathy for it. Empathy, perhaps, understanding of why I always seem so busy when I actually spend a lot of evenings alone, but not sympathy. I don't like being asked where Andy is, and then getting an "awwwwww" when I say he is on a week-long trip to Texas or whatever. That only makes it worse since the only way I can get through it is to make it feel normal.
The silver lining to it all, is that we rarely get sick of eachother and we don't take our time for granted. I still get "thank-yous" for dinner, since home-cooked meals aren't exactly the norm for my traveller husband. But oh how I wish for a companion to sit next to me in church every Sunday, for the normalcy and comfort of spending every day together and knowing that I can make plans(and truly enjoy them) without guilt.
As I write, my big hunk of dog is sitting on the floor demolishing a bone, happy as a clam to have his mama home and get to spend some time under my feet. At least, no matter how late at night it is, I have Sam. :)

Confessions of a wanna-be cowgirl

I've got a new favorite. I'm addicted - hopelessly addicted. My sister, (who, now that I think of it isn't really the type to get addicted to this kind of story), turned me on to the following website: http://www.thepioneerwoman.com/ You have GOT to be kidding me. Go from city girl to country girl? My dream come true, only she did it a lot better than I'll ever be able to. The closest I'll come to wrangling right now is chasing both cats down the stairs because one of them had a "behavioral" accident on my couch.

Which one is it? The Seasick Tabby or Beer-Drinkin' Blackie?:

The world may never know. For now I'm cleaning out the litter box daily so that it's "an inviting place for them to open the floodgates" rather than on my sofa. "Shoot em" says my dad, "lock them in the basement for the remainder of their lives" says my husband. But I can't help it- I love my furballs. One just left my lap to curl up next to me as I type. "purrrrr"

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, The Pioneer Woman or "PW" as she calls her self to save typing time. It's not that I'm jealous, ok I am, I'm lusting after her life. Why can't I get up every morning to go "work" cattle in boots and blue jeans rather than putting on my oh-so-professinal attire and heading off to work?

My oldest sister said PW reminds her of me in an alternate life. I don't think we live alternate lives, I think she's just living the one I've always wanted. I told mom about it, she said: "well, it is kinda like you, andy's a pilot-boy (ok, when did that become the same as cowboy?) and you're a country girl." Mom, when did you start calling me a country girl? Haha, I wish.

I do find it amazing though how I kinda tend to stick out like a sore thumb in my family in that regard. I may not want to spend all day at a regular job, but I will (and once did) get up at dawn to throw on the same clothes I wore yesterday, throw my hair in a ponytail, and head out to spend the day throwing hay, scooping poo, and doing a mirade of other duties one might call kinda gross if you don't have the heart for it. Anyone remember the story CHR's resident farrier shared at my wedding? I won't repeat it. But for those of you that think you know, YOU KNOW.

I've told hubby time and again - our kids will be country kids. He knows I'm serious and agrees with me for the most part (I'm not sure he knows just how serious I am). Step two, Lord willing, in the Heemstra family household (step one being the house we own now) will be a house...with....land. I'm not talking an acre, in the middle of a subdivision, where the lots are large but still mostly landscaped and with zero shade trees. (I hatehatehate clear cutting for new subdivisions and then "replacing" the trees with seedlings(or yearlings, is that just an animal term?)) <--look double parenthesis :) Seriously, what's the point.......except allowing the developer to reshape the land the way they wants so they can get the most lots out of it. Blah, gimme trees!!!!!

So anyways, back to kids. I seriously wanna have about a half dozen of those "hillbilly deluxe" kinda kids, the ones that wear denim with denim, and aren't afraid to step in poop - hey, it happens. Cute outfits - yeah, i like em. But I hope my kids can be less worried about it than I was and just be their cute selves. Listen to me, sounds like I have kids, I just have these:

And this:

Far from a cowboy, but hey, he's my far-from-cowboy and it's not the cowboy I'm lusting after (fine, he's cute ok, read her novel, no man is THAT romantic, uhg) it's the lifestyle. It's something to strive for anyway. I'm not talking about being "that house" on the side of a highway somewhere with two sickly donkeys wandering a trash-strewn lawn and 13 kids with vacant expressions sitting on the porch, and a guard-turkey (sorry Uncle Mike, but it's kinda weird ok?). I'm just saying, I'd rather live simply and have a family that ers (spelling?) on the shall we say less main-stream? side than have a bunch of kids that are dependent on television and the internet (not saying I've never been a little guilty of this, hello Guitar Hero) to determine who they are and what is important to them.

**side bar** I am not saying everyone who lives a life other than the one I'd like to aim for is going to fail, it is just my opinion that for me, and usually for my husband (ok, he's never put as much thought into it as me, but he nods and says "yes dear" alot) this is the way we'd like to raise our kids.

**end side bar**

I have no more to say, except I think I'll go put on my boots (thank goodness I actually own a pair of those--I'm on my way!) and see if the dog wants to play run-away steer so I can rope him.

kinda bored

The last few weeks have been rather non-eventful so I'm sorry for my lack of blogging! Our lives at the moment consist mainly of going to work, sleep, and just "hanging out" with the neighbors. Easter was fun- on Saturday I volunteered at the Easter Egg Hunt at church and Sunday morning the youth group made breakfast for the church as a fund raiser for their summer trip. After church we headed out to eat at Andy's Grandparent's house and hang out with the "fam."
Every day I pray for more and more warmth so that we can start spending time outside gardening and walking the dog a little more often. Tonight it is off to my body burn class while Andy and Samson spend a little (more) daddy-doggy time together!

updates

The neighborhood boys on New Years...Jeff, Steve, Andre, Jamie, and Steve's friend.

The girls...Rachel, Anna, Meghan, Beth, Me...oh and Jamie.

Andy playing with our favorite new toy for Christmas - Guitar Hero!

Oh man.

SNOW PUPPY!

He's chewing on a stick, not vomitting snow...

Can't catch me!

Offering a Helping Paw

I know, I know. It's been too long. But life has been hectic and I rarely have the computer! Since my last post we have gotten new windows (yay!), had a couple of random pet-peeing incidents, and about twelve Christmas parties. Samson has also grown and is getting smarter by the day.
The best story I have of Samson is that he has now learned that if a toy "wanders" into the bedroom, he is allowed to retrieve it. So now, rather than the occasional rolling ball followed by Sammy tentatively picking it up in his teeth and backing out of the room, toys of every shape and size often come flying into the bedroom "of their own free will." Sammy, acting coy, sneaks in after them and pauses to sniff around. This is happening more and more frequently and I've now caught him on several occasions nudging toys covertly into the room.
Oh the joys of having a smart dog!!!

Today he helped with picture hanging by bringing Dad the hammer. Here are a few highlights:

and the finished product! ignore the nail hole...

surprises around every corner

It's just been one change after another in the Heemstra household over the last few weeks, but hopefully this will be the last for awhile. Today, we entered puppy-parenthood! While we were planning to get a dog eventually, we did not intend to bring one home on November 29th.

My wonderful hubby was planning to get me a dog for Christmas but decided to go to the Humane Society today to check out the situation and see what went into adopting. Apparently the Humane Society does not hold dogs and you are allowed to bring a dog home with you upon your first meeting (I've never heard of this before). So, when Andy ran into Tweedle, a dog we had seen on the petfinder.com website a few weeks ago and fell in love, (awwww) it was do-or-die time. "Tweedle" was sitting quitely in his cage watching Andy walk around when all the other dogs were barking their heads off. When Andy asked to see him in a visiting room, he jumped all over Andy and made it very well known that he wanted to be taken home. After much deliberation, we decided that Andy should return to the Humane Society this afternoon and bring Tweedle home.

It has been an afternoon to remember, the first time I met our new dog he did not even give me a chance to say hi, he immediately began licking my face. At a visit to PetSmart he wanted to meet all the other dogs and had fun entertaining all the sales people as he dragged us around the store. We purchased all the puppy necessities- a cage, food, food and water bowls, a brush, a chew toy, rawhide bone, collar and leash, and of course, treats...and headed home to meet the kitties. Just kidding, they are hidden away in the basement at the moment. Not, however until after Louis caught sight of him and immediately every hair stood on end and he let out an unearthly hiss.

Anyways, Tweedle has since been renamed so meet Samson!!!

"it's beginning to look alot like christmas!"

So...I fully intended to make do our first Christmas as husband and wife with the two strands of lights and twenty or so miscellaneous ornaments that i've collected over the years, but my usually uninterested husband suddenly decided that we simply must go all out and decorate more than anyone else on the street. upon finding (some) deals at meijer this evening (10pm by the time we got there) his spirits were not dampened when we had to settle for two "net lights" and a large lighted garland for the front door. our bill was raised slightly by the 16 cans of soup we bought (they are 8 fro $10 right now, Campbell's Chunky-highly recommended, we go through a lot of soup), but still, we were reminded that nothings is cheap during the actual season and we will have to finish stocking up at a few "half off the half off" sales come January 1st.
So, tree decorated, stockings hung, and garland waiting by the front door to be hung in the morning...i'm off to bed. Louis and Whit, who have both tried on the reindeer antlers this evening, thoroughly hating them and then getting into a meowing/tackling fight to burn off their frustration, will hopefully join us in a looooong slumber.
pictures will follow once the decorating is done, but at the moment my cheif decorator is passed out on the couch.
g'night!

One Thing After Another

Hubby is finally back!! Aaaand out with Chris for the evening. Brat. Nah, I'm just kidding, we all went out to dinner and a movie tonight, when, at about 6:30 pm I was all about heading downtown with them for line dancing at (uhg) the Margarita Grille (uhg) ... until after the movie when I decided that my looooooong week had caught up to me and I no longer felt like making it a late night. So...I told them that as long as they came home at a reasonable time, behaved, and I got Andy for the rest of the weekend, then they could go have a little fun without me.

So, although I am home alone for the rest of the evening, I'm determined to enjoy it since this week was just a tad frustrating.

Here is the low-down on my "fun" week:

Almost lost my cool with an overly frustrating customer, "passed her off" to one of my coworkers so that I didn't really lose it.

Aided a friend or two with relationship difficulties.

Dealt with another difficult customer who had two cabinets come in wrong. Said customer then proceeded to unload his frustrations on the entire accounting department by telling them that the 29th Street location needs "more knowledge and less eye-candy." I'm not going to even START on trying to explain this customer.

Missing Hubby every step of the way

Found out that Andy is leaving again on Sunday for "a couple days" after being home for only 3.

Had my internet and cable turned off because of "back payments" from the cable company for which I never recieved a bill, then finding out that said bills supposedly totalled over $200. (it was a mistake by the cable company, but a pain in the butt nonetheless)

Running out of refills at the pharmacy for my medication, leaving a message for the doctor asking for refills, a message which he never got. THEN when I finally got him to call them in, finding out that the pharmacy wouldn't fill it because they had record that someone had done it the day before (probably tried when I called the first time) and arguing with them until someone figured out what really happened. Give me my drugs!!!!

So, that's it. There were other frustrations at work, but I'm done complaining for now I suppose. I'll leave you with a wonderful blonde joke I got from a friend of mine (a great example of "eye-candy" no doubt):

A blonde's boyfriend decided to take her to a football game and hey had great seats, right behind their team's bench. After the game the boyfriend turned to his girlfriend and asked her how she had liked the experience.

"I loved it, especially the tight pants and all the muscles, but I don't know why they all tried to kill eachother over 25 cents"

"What do you mean?" asked the boyfriend

"Well, at the beginning of the game they flipped a coin and then the rest of the game everyone kept yelling: 'get the quarterback, get the quarterback!' Hellllloooo it's only 25 cents!!"

:)P.S. I may be a blonde, but I know the difference between a quarter horse, a quarter back, and a 25 cent coin:

a little bit of everything.

Well, it looks like I'm not the only one not posting like I should, as I just checked two other blogs whose latest posts are as old, if not older than mine. However, I finally have a moment of internet so I am going to take advantage of it! It's been frustrating with Andy gone for so long, not only is the loss of internet (he took our only working computer) a little frustrating, but I cannot believe how bored I've been! There are times that all I want is some time alone and can never seem to get it, now I have plenty and don't know what to do with it. I guess it's a Catch 22, the grass IS always greener on the other side. Ok, enough cliches.
Tonight I am watching Alissa's girls, Morgan and Ryleigh, they are adorable and a lot of fun. Plus, its really more fun than I could expect sitting at home so I'm happy to do a little babysitting. It's been a long time since I did this for anyone besides my own neices and nephews! Not only does this give me something to do (i'm pathetic, it's Saturday night!!) but I also get access to internet- fabulous! So I'm quite content at the moment.
I think I'll spend a little time researching houses and trying to find something that Andy and I can both agree on. Anyone have a suggestion of where to look? I want a single-family home, though the option of a duplex is not out of the question. More than anything, I just want a safe location for when I'm home without Andy, and a house that doesn't require major work. Remodeling I can handle, but things like roof, electrical, heating...that worries me a little more. Keep your eyes peeled I guess...
~Krista

neglectful me

Well, for those of you that do not know, we did not get the house. :( I'm trying not to let emotions get too high over the loss of the house, it was somewhere that I really thought I could see us calling "home." Rather, I am looking at this as an opportunity to continue having "fun" looking and to find an even better option. The house had it's faults, but I loved the area and the layout. As I have been told countless times however, I know that God has something else in mind. Sometimes it's just trusting Him and being patient that is the hardest part.
Anyways, on to more fun things, I have been super busy this whole week. That has been wonderful as Andy is away in Texas studying to be a cowboy. While I definatly miss him, I had high hopes of using his absence as an opportunity to get back into a stringent workout routine to work off my post-wedding chub. Alas, my wonderful friends and family, realizing that I would be alone so much, have stepped in to fill all of my freetime. (I love you all!) And work has proven to be extremely busy and wearing on my energy and schedule all week. So, as often happens, working out has been postponed to a later date. And I'm FINE with it! :)
In addition to plenty of time catching up with family and friends, I am also taking the opportunity to get back to my favorite bar: The Bresa http://www.thebresa.com/ . While Andy does not necessarily dislike the Bresa, it is much more fun with "the girls" since we actually dance and our main perogative is not to sit at the bar and drink beer. The boys tend to get bored real fast if the band is not playing songs to which they know the dances and thus the band "sucks" and dancing is "gay" and bad attitudes reign. Tonight is GIRLS NIGHT!!! And I am much looking forward to an evening spent with my Rachel and Allison. :)

Budget Woes

Writing a budget is not my favorite thing to do. Unlike some people, it is not sticking to the budget that is a problem (though the amount of money allotted to me in the budget may rub me the wrong way, I'm still fairly able to stick to it), no, it is rather the ACT of writing a budget that really irks me. I don't much understand it, really. Aside from saving every single receipt I get, and spending hours in front of a spreadsheet, there is really no good way to go about it. Everything else is just guessing.
Plus, who honestly spends the same amount month-to-month? I know it is supposed to all "even out in the wash" over time, but the stress of watching myself go drastically over one month, and then steadily slightly under the next five- in my effort to make up for that one month- is just too much for me.
Perhaps it is the entire story that really gets me. I could tell you roughly how much I spend a week on groceries, gas, and what my rent costs, but can I get close enough to stake my entire budget on it? I don't know...what if this week I needed lots of condiments? (things you only buy a few times a year) but last week I only really needed milk? Do I find a happy medium? You can sense my dilema here.
So here is my preference. I want hubby to watch our finances and come up with a schedule of what we typically spend, he likes that stuff anyways. Then I want him to lay it all out nice and easy for me so that I can look it over, pretend I totally understand, nod my head and go on my merry way with what I would affectionately term an "allowance" for what I can spend on groceries, myself, and him (as I inevitably buy his clothes as well as my own) each month.
Is this wrong? I have no ambitions of being a 1950's wifey with no clue as to what is going on, I'd like to be kept aprised of the situation...however how much I am actually involved is not really of any concern to me. I'd just be happy to spend the money...

I love Sundays

Mmm. I love Sundays! It always starts off the same way: Coffee and something baked and yummy. We've started our first tradition of buying something like muffins or danishes or coffee cake on Saturday to eat Sunday morning. While I'd like to make it a sit-down affair where we enjoy a cup of coffee together at the breakfast table, most of the time it ends up being a treat on the way to church, but we're getting there.
There is something so nice about going to church, seeing everyone with their families, listening to a message for an hour and then stepping out into the narthex for fellowship and catching up. Today we had a bit of a surprise that on the church bulletin board there has suddenly appeared a full 81/2"x11 piece of copy paper with a photo of our wedding (thanks mom), that drew some attention. We also stayed after today to listen to a missionary talk about his work in Oman, where our pastor and his wife went on sabbatical last year. He was interesting and inspiring for sure.
The rest of today is spent making salsa together with our new food processor (yay! although it did take some trial and error), checking out the open house for a home we've been eyeing, going to the church picnic at the Paarlbergs, and (hopefully) dinner and a round of Settlers of Catan with Rachel and Aaron.
Did I mention my best girlfriend is engaged and I'm in the wedding!?!? woo hoo! So excited ;)

"The rule of creating a blog...

...is that you must keep it up" -Bradi Kreider
My sis and I have been talking about my starting up a blog for quite some time now, although originally it was to revolve around the everyday lives of my two feline companions, Louis and Whit. However now that I have gotten married, I may have things to write about that people will actually read. (without emailing my nerdy blogs to their friends)
Stay tuned for what will surely be the rollercoaster ride to come!