? ??????????????Phone Booth? ????? ?? ???Rating: 4.4 (30 Ratings)??1041 Grabs Today. 38121 Total Grabs. ??
????Preview?? | ??Get the Code?? ?? ?????Cobalt Flowers? ????? ?? ???Rating: 4.5 (11 Ratings)??777 Grabs Today. 37756 Total Grabs. ??????Preview?? | ??Get the Code?? ?? ???????????? BLOGGER TEMPLATES AND TWITTER BACKGROUNDS ?

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Denial, Coping Mechanism, or just plain Clueless?

I just got back from Applebees where a group of twin (or more!) moms get together every month. It's not something organized by a leader or larger organization, but of all the different "groups" I've tried out lately I think it's the one I enjoy the most. All of the women there have already had their multiples. They actually formed as a branch of one of the other "Moms of Multiples" groups in the area, but I don't feel weird or left out because my babies are still waiting to arrive. It's nice to just sit and listen, tucking away tips for later, but the girls are also great about asking me how my pregnancy is going and all the "good" questions/comments that only people who have gone through the same experience can bring up.
However as I drove home tonight I realized that tonight, and in the last few days, I've answered about a thousand different variations of the question "how are you feeling about the fact that in 6 days or less you will be a twin mom?" and that I really have no idea what I've said or what the real answer is.
I'm not particularly scared at the moment, or nervous. I'm excited for sure, and maybe just...apprehensively optimistic? To even begin to answer this question I have to start with the fact that I'm scheduled for an induction but honestly feel like a ticking time bomb; I'm fully aware that just because we have a date does not inhibit the babies from coming sooner. So I fill my days with fairly mundane tasks that I know I won't have time to do later even though there is also a sense of urgency- should we wait until Friday to make that trip to the grocery store when we will stock up on all the last minute stuff we think we'll want to have around?
And then there's delivery. There are always unknowns, obviously, but since these are my first AND there are two babies, the unknowns are kind of compounded. Will both babies remain head down? Will Baby B have some sort of distress from Baby A's delivery that causes an emergency C-Section? Will induction go fast or slow for me? Will it be hours between the twins' births? Will they be 100% healthy or are there unforseen problems?
Next we move on to after the fact. Everyone wants to know how I'm going to tackle this or that obstacle. Then a lot of them smile and say "you say that now, just wait! You'll eat your words." Which is probably very true, but then why ask what I'm going to do? I frankly don't have a clue what feeding or sleeping times will look like, I haven't scheduled help for the first month(s) like so many people have suggested because I just have no idea when I'll want help or what our particular struggles will be (ps. I know we'll want food and dog-walkers:), what was a nightmare for one person might not be the thing we struggle with and vice versa.
Then there's my husband, who is so pleasantly oblivious I just have to giggle. Just now he sent me a text saying: "We're having our babies on Sunday, right?" And a few days ago he momentarily forgot the girl name we settled on (which he basically picked out himself by the way), and also the boy's middle name. He's hardly touched the book I got him when we were newly pregnant but he's "test driven" every toy we've gotten. Don't get me wrong, he has been very supportive and excited in the last few weeks and I honestly don't expect him to be clued into every detail right now, I think that would be a very unrealistic expectation for a first-time dad. But it's still pretty humorous to recognize how differently two people who are married to each other can prepare (or not prepare) for the arrival of children.
All of this is to say, as I sit here on a Tuesday night, 5 (or 6? or 2?) days before we meet our babies, I'm not sure if my lack of fear and nerves and generally unconcerned demeanor is denial, some kind of coping mechanism, or just plain cluelessness. I imagine it's a combination of all three. As bad an example as this might be it sorta reminds me of the days leading up to any other major life change I've experienced- like leaving for college or getting married. You reach a point when you know there are going to be obstacles, stumbling blocks, frustrations, mountain top moments, and probably an argument or two, but those things don't phase you like they did 3 months ago. Now it's just time. Time to get started, to figure out those things that will be hard and those that will be wonderful. Time to realize what it means to be a mom and a parent with your spouse.
There are two things I know for sure tonight, September 28th, 2010- it's time to get going, and no matter what our struggles, it's going to be great :)

Friday, September 24, 2010


Today could have started off better. Samson's nails were long and unruly, he was a bit stinky, the last of his summer coat was shedding away, and after a few months of hot weather he had lots of dirt that needed removing. Plus, he seemed itchy and he is prone to dry skin, so we decided to schedule a fall appointment with the groomer (we average one good groomer visit per season, sometimes 2 in the Spring) so he'd be fresh as a daisy for fall.
Since my neighbor's dog was also in need of a good grooming we made a dual appointment and took them in this morning. Upon our arrival to pick the dogs up this afternoon the groomer informed us that BOTH dogs had fleas. I have no idea where they picked them up, Anna's cat is an indoor/outdoor cat and we'd recently spent an afternoon with all 3 pets together, but all of her pets are flea treated regularly.
Thankfully neither of us has yet to find a single flea in our houses but we're washing everything- bedding, blankets, towels, both Anna's cats (one of whom she says seemed to think she was trying to murder him) etc, and giving all the rooms with carpet a good vacuuming. Plus I picked up some flea treatment for Samson at the vet this afternoon.
Here's hoping this is a one-time thing...not what I pictured my Friday afternoon to look like :(

Saturday, September 18, 2010

If Samson Were a Twin....

(Take a look at the pup on the right. Other than having 2 same-color eyes, this is almost exactly what Samson looked like when we brought him home. Thus the Humane Society dubbed him "Tweedle").

Let's be honest, Samson most likely does have a twin (or two) out there somewhere, but since we do not personally own more than one of him, he is an only child to us. Below is a picture I found online and I just couldn't resist taking a few moments to imagine life with 2 Samsons...
If Samson Were a Twin:-My house would never be clean.
-I'd probably never see my eldest niece again.
-We'd have to install a yard of gravel rather than grass as the tender shoots would never survive 8 galloping paws.
-I would buy black carpet and pretend it's clean.
-Trying to go for a walk would be...well let's just say impossible without help.
-The mailman would probably just leave any packages that came for us at the curb or the neighbor's house.
-We'd get to experience both the pensive teenage stage (x2) and rambunctious toddler stage (x2) on a daily basis, only these children are generally mute and only respond to food. Wait, that's not so out of the ordinary....
-When Andy is out of town I'd be doubly in the doghouse (I swear Samson thinks I am the reason Daddy is not around and is more aloof than a 16 year old full of teenage angst).
-I might lose my mind but I'd be in a cute, furry place.
P.S. I'll say it now- if anyone is looking for a creative way to help once the babes' come, taking Samson for the occasional long walk or jog would be AWESOME for my sanity.

Is it odd that 2 Samsons scare me a little more than 2 infants? ;)

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

35 Weeks

...and feeling every inch. Don't let my seemingly small belly fool you, according to the online lists my babies are the size of honeydew melons. And since they have been measuring consistently right on target I believe that guesstimate is accurate. I like honeydew. Not too sure how I like having two of them in me at once though. If you can imagine eating 2 honeydews and the tummy-ache plus other discomforts that would be implied, that is about how I feel right now.

There are all kinds of "extras" that come with carrying twins- extra hormones, extra weight, extra tiredness, extra aches and pains, and the good extras like ultrasounds and generally attentive care from the doctor's office. I've done my best to take all these extras to heart and enjoy them for what they are- the fact that we are having not one, but two babies whereas not that long ago when medical science wasn't so advanced we might have had none.

However this week, I feel like I've hit my wall. I haven't been sleeping well since about 20 weeks (I blame a lot of that on our very indented mattress), but right now periods of sleep are down to about an hour long. Suddenly I'm twice as nauseated as I ever was- especially at random times like the middle of the night and middle of the afternoon -I cannot catch my breath or sit in a car, and while last week I was still feeling fairly motivated, I suddenly cannot do more than unload the dishwasher without feeling like I need to sit down before I fall down. My hands ache like they are full of arthritis, I have dull headaches and am constantly woken up by jabs and stabs from one of the babies.
I'm still trying to take everything with a smile, accomplish as much as I can, and enjoy every moment of "me time" I have left. While I will be SO happy to be done being pregnant for 2 babies whenever they decide to show their little faces, I can't help but be slightly terrified of what is to come. There are moments when I think 37/38 weeks cannot come quick enough and others when I can't believe the changes that are about to come.

Regardless, as long as these babies are 100% healthy they can come whenever they want. And lets just say I'm glad the decision of when is not up to me because inevitably, given the fluctuation of my emotions, tolerances, and general sanity, I would make the wrong decision!

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Bye Bye Black Kitty

Well, today my sweet black kitty went to his new home.
Surprisingly enough I did not cry. I've cried a lot over the last several months as I struggled with what to do with him, worried over never finding him an appropriate home, and hit one roadblock after another. But seriously, prayer and persistence paid off. Back in June Rachel posted an ad about Louis on GRCC's website and that same day a woman responded saying she was considering taking him. She needed some time to work things out and decide for sure so I continued to advertise while we waited.
In the meantime I only had one other interested person who after I waded through her email full of grammatical errors and missing punctuation told me she had 2 dogs currently living with her as her daughter and future son-in-law's trailer roof had collapsed on them and they needed a place to stay...you can probably imagine why I was not comfortable with this arrangement and though it was hard to turn someone down when I so desperately needed a place for him to go, I just knew this wasn't the right fit.
For anyone that has never had to rehome a pet before, it's really a difficult thing to do in today's world. For one thing there is a huge overpopulation of cats. Summer is often referred to as "kitten season" because cats have their litters typically between April and October every year. I worked at Harbor Humane Society in West Olive in college and I watched several cat owners bring in their unspayed outdoor female and her litters naively thinking all would be well and their cats would find loving homes- only for the Humane Society workers to be forced to take the mama cat and all her kittens straight to the E-room to be put down. I know it sounds horrible, but it didn't make any sense to tell these people that their cats would never even be put up for adoption because most likely they would just take them home and release them outdoors to make overpopulation even worse. Many of these people brought multiple litters to the shelter before summer was out.
The second problem when trying to rehome your cat is that there really are people out there who will patrol sites like Craigslist looking for "free to good home" cats and kittens to use in laboratories or as *gulp* reptile food. The best way around this is to ask for a vet reference or a rehoming fee, though the rehoming fee can often turn good people away in a world overrun with free cats and kittens.
Needless to say I agonized quite a bit about what to do with Louis but in the end, the woman from GRCC decided she and her family would take him, and I'm confident he found a perfect home. His new owner has a couple of cats and was not daunted by the fact that he has had the occasional UTI and accident outside of the litter box. She even sent me her address and offered to let me come by to see him in the future. The icing on the cake is when her son told me he'd be posting pictures of facebook tonight so I could check in and see how he was doing. They must love cats :)
While I really will miss his cuddles and "talking" and "hugs," I know this is for the best. Samson has already told me how happy his is to be an only child- for now, and it feels great to know I can have the carpets cleaned once and for all without the worry of coughed-up hairballs, litter, or another accident. Plus my dad can finally come over without wanting to gouge out his eyeballs! Relief is what I'm feeling right now as I pray that Louis doesn't feel too abandoned and settles happily into his new home.
A perfect illustration of why Louis was never very comfortable with Samson around: "Someone is watching you...."
He was never very excited about having a camera stuck in his face.

"Wow! Look at that otter! Can I have one? Please? Please?!?"

This is one of my all-time favorite pictures of Louis, sitting on my desk in our old apartment watching the snow. Love you Louis-Bedouis!